Thomas Rhett’s Candid Confession: The Struggles Of Chasing Validation And Why He Quit Using Social Media

Rhett revealed why he hasn’t been on social media in over 7 months and feeling the need to change direction in his songwriting during a phase of discouragement.

By

Melinda Lorge

Melinda Lorge is a Nashville-based freelance writer who specializes in covering country music. Along with Music Mayhem, her work has appeared in publications, including Rare Country, Rolling Stone Country, Nashville Lifestyles Magazine, Wide Open Country and more. After joining Rare Country in early 2016, Lorge was presented with the opportunity to lead coverage on late-night television programs, including “The Voice” and “American Idol,” which helped her to sharpen her writing skills even more. Lorge earned her degree at Middle Tennessee State University, following the completion of five internships within the country music industry. She has an undeniable love for music and entertainment. When she isn’t living and breathing country music, she can be found enjoying time outdoors with family and friends.

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Posted on August 30, 2023

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Thomas Rhett; Photo Courtesy of BobbyCast/YouTube

In 10 years of his career, Thomas Rhett has accumulated 20 No. 1 hits, but even he sometimes struggles with self-confidence when trying to please his fans with his music.

The country music superstar recently opened up about the power of social media and why he no longer uses it during a candid conversation with Bobby Bones on the Bobbycast Podcast.

Thomas Rhett; Photo By Andrew Wendowski
Thomas Rhett; Photo By Andrew Wendowski

Why Did Thomas Rhett Quit Using Social Media?

During the episode, which ran for over an hour and included a number of topics, Rhett revealed that he quit using social media platforms because he was letting the feedback he was receiving get in the way of his decision-making process. He also shared that he became reliant on the number of views he was getting, using that system to test the validity of his success.

“I haven’t been on social media since January,” Rhett told Bones. “It was getting to a point where, I mean, it sounds super cliché to say it, but it was just taking up so much of my time, and I was finding so much of my worth in a post. And especially since all the algorithm stuff changed, you started to be like, ‘Man, I used to post videos, and they’d get a million views, no doubt.’ And then you start to see this thing of like, ‘Okay, my views are starting to go down. Does that mean that I am starting to suck more?’”

Watch Thomas Rhett’s Full Interview With Bobby Bones Below

Thought He Needed To Sound More Like Luke Combs Or Morgan Wallen For Success

Rhett went on to share that other people’s comments and reactions would get into his head to the point where he would change direction in his songwriting with hopes of sounding more like Luke Combs or Morgan Wallen. 

“You would put songs out, and then some people would think they were really cool, and then some people would just hate on ’em. And then you start to see all the people in our genre, the bloggers just be like, this is trash Thomas Rhett music. This is not what he’s best at. All these kinds of things,” Rhett shared. “So then you start making music out of fear.”

“One of my producers, Julian, said, ‘You can’t work out of hit-desperation. You have to work out of hit-inspiration. And I think for a while there, dude, I was working out of hit desperation,” he added. “I was so terrified of what this genre would think about what I thought was cool that it got to a point where I just wanted to write what I think they think would be cool.”

Thomas Rhett; Photo Courtesy of The BobbyCast/YouTube
Thomas Rhett; Photo Courtesy of The BobbyCast/YouTube

Went Through A Phase Of Discouragement

Rhett has always maintained his authenticity of putting out songs that are a reflection of his life, including ones that pay tribute to his family and wife, Lauren Akins, like “Die a Happy Man,” “Remember You Young,” “Star of the Show,” and others. But, despite that, he went through a phase of discouragement as he watched other artists thrive in the social sphere.

“[I did] a lot of predicting of being like, ‘Well, maybe if I write songs that sort of feel like a Luke Combs thing, then these people will think I’m like, okay, again.’ You know what I’m saying? And ‘Maybe if I can do some of this stuff that Morgan [Wallen] is doing, then maybe this group will think that maybe I can fit into that group,” Rhett said before coming to the realization that, “I didn’t get here by ever fitting into a group. I did the complete opposite.”

Thomas Rhett; Photo By Andrew Wendowski
Thomas Rhett; Photo By Andrew Wendowski

Wasn’t Being Present With His Family

Rhett says that he decided to make the official shift of pulling the plug on his socials around the holidays in 2022 after he wrapped up his tour. Another reason for doing so was because he felt he wasn’t being present with his family and instead kept worrying about his online progress.  

“I kind of go into weird places when I’m off the road….. When I’m off the road is a really challenging time for me because when you’re on the road, you’re getting three straight nights of dopamine, affirmation of hits, celebration,” Rhett shared. “And then you come home, and I love my children, and I love my wife, but it’s the complete opposite. It’s like retractable dopamine. So I was off the road. I’ve been off the road for two or three months and just constantly on my freaking phone.”

Thomas Rhett, Lauren Akins, And Daughters Willa, Ada, Lennon, and Lillie; Photo Courtesy of Instagram
Thomas Rhett, Lauren Akins, And Daughters Willa, Ada, Lennon, and Lillie; Photo Courtesy of Instagram

“My kids are literally asking me questions, and I’m not even hearing them cause I’m just [on my phone],” he continued. “So yeah, it was like January 1. It was one of my New Year’s resolution-type things that I thought would last for two weeks. I’ve never really fully quit social media. I haven’t even seen an app since January. So I hired a team. I mean, everything that we post is from me. It’s just that I’m not physically scrolling, looking at the comments, doing the stuff.”

Quit Nicotine After Over A Decade Of Use

Aside from calling it quits on social media, Rhett also made a second New Year’s Resolution — to quit nicotine. He said he has been dipping since he was 18, but thus far has been nicotine-free for at least three weeks. 

“I’m trying to quit things that are crutches for me. You know what I’m saying? Social media was a crutch. It was the place where I needed validation, but then it was the place that I hated when it didn’t validate me. And so nicotine was like that crutch for me,” Rhett said. “It was just like when I felt nervous, nicotine, when I felt weird, nicotine when I felt happy, it was always just a thing. So I mean, I haven’t been off of it that long, but it’s been three weeks, which is the longest I’ve ever gone.” 

Thomas Rhett; Photo by Andrew Wendowski
Thomas Rhett; Photo by Andrew Wendowski

As he continues to steer clear of some of his addicting habits, Rhett has some help in doing so with his packed schedule. The country crooner is currently on his Home Team Tour 2023, which features Cole Swindell and Nate Smith as openers. The trek, which launched on May 4., will wrap with back-to-back shows at Nashville’s Bridgestone Arena on Sept. 29-Sept. 30. 

For more information on Thomas Rhett’s upcoming tour dates and new music, visit his official website HERE.

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Melinda Lorge is a Nashville-based freelance writer who specializes in covering country music. Along with Music Mayhem, her work has appeared in publications, including Rare Country, Rolling Stone Country, Nashville Lifestyles Magazine, Wide Open Country and more. After joining Rare Country in early 2016, Lorge was presented with the opportunity to lead coverage on late-night television programs, including “The Voice” and “American Idol,” which helped her to sharpen her writing skills even more. Lorge earned her degree at Middle Tennessee State University, following the completion of five internships within the country music industry. She has an undeniable love for music and entertainment. When she isn’t living and breathing country music, she can be found enjoying time outdoors with family and friends.

See more posts from Melinda Lorge