In an interview with CBS Mornings‘ Anthony Mason on Monday (Oct. 3), the chart-topping superstar opened up about her life after divorce.
“I think when there’s a big life decision like [divorce], it’s not a sudden one and there’s a lot that happens before that becomes public. So, I’m on my active healing journey and a big part of that is showing up for this album and showing up for myself like I never have,” Ballerini, 29, said.
On August 29, Ballerini took to social media to share a statement with fans, revealing that her and Evans have separated after nearly five years of marriage.
“Friends, I’ve always tried my best to share my life with you in a real and vulnerable way, while also protecting layers of my personal life as they unfold,” Ballerini shared in the statement. ”This is now public record so I wanted you to hear from me directly that I am going through a divorce.” At the time, Ballerini continued to tell fans that it was a “deeply difficult decision” to make and is a “result of a journey of love, growth, and effort that ultimately has come to an end.”
The “Heartfirst” singer then added that she will always cherish the memories that her and Evans made together. “It’s hard to find the words here…but I feel extremely grateful for the years of marriage to Morgan and hopeful for the next seasons,” Ballerini added. “With very active schedules coming up, please be mindful that we are both fragile, actively healing, and showing up the best we can.”
While chatting with Mason, Ballerini also shared that she is “really proud” of herself for going against her desire to make everyone around her happy. “I’m a peacemaker, we’ve talked about this before and I’m a people pleaser, so to do something that kind of goes against those two things is really difficult,” Ballerini admitted.
She then admitted, “It’s rough. It’s also rough like it’s not chaotic, it’s not like volatile, it just didn’t work out and that sometimes is like a difficult narrative to get your head around when you’re just like ‘oh my gosh, this is a good person and I’m a good person and this is just no longer good anymore.'”
In addition, Ballerini also acknowledged that you can often feel like a failure after a divorce saying, “It’s easy to shame yourself and it’s easy to want to hide and I just want to be proud of myself in 10 years on this season of my life. This is not just a heavy time in my life. This is also a celebratory time in my life. I don’t want to shade that because that’s important to feel.”
On September 3, Ballerini shared a vulnerable clip of herself on TikTok, documenting “a complex time” in her life. The clip, soundtracked to Katie Gregson-MacLeod’s “Complex (demo),” found Ballerini sitting naked, wearing only jewelry, in a bathtub full of water with black eyeliner and mascara running down her cheeks, presumably from crying. As the emotional clip continues, Ballerini lays back and submerges herself in the water.
a complex time.
During the interview on CBS Mornings, Ballerini was asked about the clip and her decision to share such an personal moment of sadness with fans.
“It was my weekend to fall apart,” Ballerini explained, before adding, “I just wanted people to remember that I’m feeling my feelings too and it’s a lot. It’s a lot.”
In addition to discussing her recent divorce from Evans, Ballerini chatted about her 10-city Heartfirst Tour, which kicked off on September 24 at Radio City Music Hall in New York City.
“I have made this show, if I do say so myself, really special. It’s almost like a Broadway musical,” Ballerini said, before admitting that she loves getting to bring her new album, Subject To Change, to life within her live performance. “I love it! It’s getting to bring it to life. This thing that I’ve worked in the studio on for two years.”
Ballerini’s Heartfirst Tour continues through October 14, where the trek will wrap up at Premier Theater inside Foxwoods Resort Casino.
While Ballerini may have released her latest project just a few weeks ago, she is already putting her feelings into words as she works on new music.
“[I am writing], I have to, it’s like healthy for me to just go ahead and get it on out, but I’m doing it for me… don’t know if I’ll ever put it out… when I’ll put something else out. I need a break after this… to get my life together,” Ballerini said laughing. “Chapters… You have to write ’em then you have to finish ’em then you got to turn the page.”
For tickets and additional information on Kelsea Ballerini’s Heartfirst Tour, visit www.heartfirsttour.com.