Jessie James Decker; Photo Courtesy of Getty Images for CMT
Jessie James Decker; Photo Courtesy of Getty Images for CMT

Jessie James Decker Says She Constantly Feels “Ripped Apart” Online & Often Considers “Quitting Everything”

Jessie James Decker has always been an open book with her fans and on Thursday (June 23), Decker detailed her most honest and revealing thoughts yet in a deeply personal letter shared via social media.

Decker admitted to struggling with her mental health over the past couple of years and candidly revealed that she grapples with body image issues and a lack of self-confidence. She admitted that her social media posts tend to be a highlight reel and said it’s time to be “open and honest” with her fans.

“The reason why I want to share this because I think I got to a place where I was trying to hide my vulnerabilities because if I made everything look great all the time it would hide my internal struggles,” she wrote.

The mother of three went on to admit that her anxiety, self-esteem, and confidence have “gotten worse” in recent years.

“It’s been a little worse lately where I just break down and cry. I’ve been battling some body image issues, and when I really think about it, I probably always have,” she said. “I go from one extreme to being obsessed with working out and being muscular and thin to just giving up and gaining because the food make me feel better and then ultimately, it’s a cycle that just gets worse again.”

Jessie James Decker Struggles With Feeling Accepted In Country Music

Decker, who released her EP, The Woman I’ve Become, in late 2021, also opened up about her country music career and confessed that she doesn’t feel accepted because she constantly has to prove herself.

“I’ve also been struggling with the challenges I face in my career. I’ve been wanting to be a country singer since I was nine years old and sometimes, I feel like I’m constantly in a battle with the rest of the industry to prove to them that I’m not just a TV personality or an influencer because that has outshined my music,” she continued. “As a woman in 2022, I don’t understand why I can’t have a family, publish books, own a fashion brand, be an influencer, and do TV without being questioned if I take my music career seriously just because I’ve chosen to dream big.”

Her vulnerable message also detailed some “family issues” that have impacted her tremendously over the past few years. She admitted that she still breaks down and cries over the situation as well as the Reddit forum that popped up during the trying times.

“I’m ripped apart constantly on a daily basis which kills me a little every day and makes me wonder what my purpose in this business is and truthfully makes me consider quitting everything sometimes and disappear,” she professed.

After battling a bout of COVID that forced her to postpone the remaining dates on her tour, Decker hit a new low.
“I feel like I let so many people down that it sent me down a spiral again of depression and made me worried no one would want to come once the tour is back up running later this summer.”

The “Should Have Known Better” singer promised that she is working through her mental health issues and assured fans they are not alone in their personal struggles.

Fans rallied around Decker, flooding the comments of her post with words of encouragement and well wishes.

Fans can read Jessie James Decker’s letter to fans in its entirety below.

I want to be open and honest. I have struggled the last couple of years. It’s up-and-down. There have been really beautiful, amazing moment but also some pretty low lows. The reason why I want to share this is because I think I got to a place where I was trying to hide my vulnerabilities because if I made everything look great all the time it would hide my internal struggles. I have also always felt a duty to make people smile and happy or laugh and always be that bubbly girl. I have a very bubbly girl. I have a very blessed life with healthy children and an incredible loving rock of a husband. But I have definitely struggled these past couple years. My anxiety has gotten worse, my self-esteem, my confidence.

It’s been a little worse lately where I just break down and cry. I’ve been battling some body image issues, and when I really think about it, I probably always have. I go from one extreme to being obsessed with working out and being muscular and thin to just giving up and gaining because the food make me feel better and then ultimately, it’s a cycle that just gets worse again.

I’ve also been struggling with the challenges I face in my career. I’ve been wanting to be a country singer since I was nine years old and sometimes, I feel like I’m constantly in a battle with the rest of the industry to prove to them that I’m not just a TV personality or an influencer because that has outshined my music. As a woman in 2022, I don’t understand why I can’t have a family, publish books, own a fashion brand, be an influencer, and do TV without being questioned if I take my music career seriously just because I’ve chosen to dream big.

I had some family issues a couple years ago that I have struggled with tremendously and still to this day make me break down and cry. I would’ve never chosen to deal with that publicly and open that door to such a personal family matter, but it happened, and it still hurts my heart. I don’t handle social media or trolls like I used to. During the private family matter a hate page on Reddit developed. I’m ripped apart constantly on a daily basis which kills me a little every day and makes me wonder what my purpose in this business is and truthfully makes me consider quitting everything sometimes and disappear. With how progressive we are getting in this digital world of preventing bullying, I still don’t know how a page like that is allowed and fear my sweet daughter seeing it someday.

To top it off I was on such a high from the tour and then got Covid and had to cancel and I feel like I let so many people down that it sent me down a spiral again of depression and made me worried no one would want to come once the tour is back up running later this summer.

I know this is a lot of information, but I wanted to get how I’ve been feeling off my chest. You have been with me my whole career and it almost didn’t feel authentic to not share what l’ve been going through. I have such a beautiful life and so many blessings, but I still have struggles and need to sit back and work on my mental health. I feel like I try to only post the good sometimes, but I think being open and honest will also help me heal through this. I know I’m not alone. And I wanted you to know you’re not alone too. I’m working through it and navigating daily on how to heal.

xo Jessie

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